Argylle

Review: Why did they make Henry Cavill’s hair so stupid? This movie was not good. Putting Elly & Aidan into Henry Cavill & Dua Lipa’s costumes was really silly. The first half of this movie was bad. The second half started off better and then become worse. My least favorite genre of movie is ones where Samuel L. Jackson has hair (jk Jackie Brown is pretty good). The smoke fight-dance scene was silly. Scratch that, It was bad. I thought things couldn’t get worse. And then Bryce Dallas Howard put those knives on her feet and skated across the oil. It looked bad. It made me feel bad. And the twist at the end made ZERO SENSE. Like Mark Wahlberg ‘Planet of the Apes’ level of sense.

High: Sam Rockwell was the main highlight. He was the least cringey (mostly) and actually had a handful of funny moments.

Low: Not to be a hater, but there were a lot of lows. But the lowest low has to be the dialogue. This is a real interaction between Elly & Aidan. ‘Look at that.’ ‘We’re flying.’ ‘We’re flying.’ ‘Thank you.’ ‘You bet.’ And during the scene in front of Prince Albert’s statue all the sentence jumping was just distracting.

Rating: 3.5/10